I think, therefore I am

Ii fhiqk, thairfor Ii am

Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.

Kulerles green iideeaz sleep fyureeuslee.

Fight linguistic extinction. Invent a language!

Fiit liqwistik ikstiqkxen. Invent a laqgwij!

When my great-great-grandfather was a young man, he travelled out into the world. First he went west; there was only sand there. Then he went north; there was only snow there. Then he went east; there the mountains were too high and great-great-grandfather couldn't climb them. At last he decided to travel south, on foot, on horseback, by cart and by boat. In the south he saw the largest city in all the world.

Wen mii graat-graat-grandfahther wuz a yuq man, hee travuld owt intuu tha wurld. Furst hee went west; thair wuz oonlee sand thair. Then hee went norfh; thair wuz oonlee snoo thair. Then hee went eest; thair tha mowntenz wer tuu hii and graat-graat-grandfahther kuhden't kliim them. At last hee disiidid tuu travul sowfh, on fuht, on horsbak, bii kahrt and bii boot. In tha sowfh hee saw tha lahrjist sitee in awl tha wurld.

Happy birthday!

Hapee burfhdaa!

Let him be pitied, who thinks there is only one way to make a language.

Let him bee piteed, huu fhiqks thair iz oonlee wun waa tuu maak a laqgwij.

The Rain Song It is raining in the night in the desert It is raining My soul is peaceful. The raindrops are falling in the daytime on the leaves The raindrops are falling My heart lifts. The time of rain has come For a time in the mountains The time of rain has come My soul rejoices.

Tha Raan Soq It iz raaniq in tha niit in tha dizurt It iz raaniq Mii sool iz peesful. Tha raandrops ahr fawliq in tha daatiim on tha leevz Tha raandrops ahr fawliq Mii hahrt lifts. Tha tiim uv raan haz kum For a tiim in tha mowntenz Tha tiim uv raan haz kum Mii sool rijoys.

All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights. They are endowed with reason and conscience and should act towards one another in a spirit of brotherhood.

Awl hyuumen beeiqz ahr born free and eekwul in dignitee and riits. Thaa ahr endowd with reezen and koncens and xuhd akt tordz wun anuther in a speerit uv brutherhuhd.

2. And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there.

2. And it kaam tuu pas, az thaa jurneed frum tha eest, that thaa fownd a plaan in tha land uv Shinar; and thaa dwelt thair.

4. And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth.

4. And thaa sed, Goo tuu, let us bild us a sitee and a tower, huuz top maa reec untuu heven; and let us maak us a naam, lest wee bee skaterd abrawd apon tha faas uv tha hool urfh.

6. And the LORD said, Behold, the people is one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do.

6. And tha LORD sed, Beehoold, tha peepul iz wun, and thaa hav awl wun laqgwij; and this thaa bigin tuu duu: and now nufhiq wil bee ristraand frum them, wic thaa hav imajend tuu duu.

8. So the LORD scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city.

8. Soo tha LORD skaterd them abrawd frum thens apon tha faas uv awl tha urfh: and thaa left awf tuu bild tha sitee.

As you wish.

Az yuu wix.

Certainly.

Surtenlee.

No problem.

Noo problum.

Very well.

Vairee wel.

Let's get moving.

Let'z get muuviq.

Reporting for duty.

Riportiq for duutee.

Tell me what to do.

Tel mee wut tuu duu.

Ready for action.

Redee for akxen.

Yes?

Yes?

What do you need?

Wut duu yuu need?

Where is my room?

Wair iz mii ruum?

Where is the bar?

Wair iz tha bahr?

Beware of the baby! O dear, what's happened? Yesterday, a pretty young girl came to our home to watch over the baby. She did what she could to entertain the child: she played with it, sung songs for it, etc. But nevertheless, the baby attacked her, tore her into pieces, devoured her, and it threw the rest out the window. What to do, what to do? I really don't know. And so, for the time being, we keep the affair silent, in order to prevent the police from starting to ask annoying questions.

Beewair uv tha baabee! Oo deer, wut's hapend? Yesterdaa, a pritee yuq gurl kaam tuu ahr hoom tuu woc oover tha baabee. Xee did wut xee kuhd tuu entertaan tha ciild: xee plaad with it, suq soqz for it, ets. But neverthales, tha baabee atakd her, tor her intuu peesiz, divower her, and it fhruu tha rest owt tha windoo. Wut tuu duu, wut tuu duu? Ii reeulee doon't noo. And soo, for tha tiim beeiq, wee keep tha afair siilent, in order tuu privent tha pulees frum stahrtiq tuu ask anoyiq kwescinz.

PORTIONS OF THE MARRIAGE CEREMONY (PART 1) [Now the priest will give a golden chain that he has just blessed, to one of the candidates, and the candidate will place it on the neck of the other candidate, and recite after the priest:] I [name] bind myself to you [name] from this day forward, whether in times of happiness or sadness, whether in days (full) of sun or rain, in good health or bad, wealth or poverty, and we will set forth on the course of our new life, always bound and united in soul and body. Thus I pledge to you my love and honor forever. [And the other candidate will do and recite the same] (PART 2) [Now the priest will say:] Let us pray to/call upon/ the Spirits [And everyone in attendance will say or sing:] Father Sun, shine upon their life, Sky, be always clear, Earth and Rain, help them to grow, Sister Vuruna, illuminate their nights, Brother Lalap, let your behavior toward them be good, Mother Sea, be calm when they sail on your surface, Wind, inflate their sail(s) and cool their faces, Forest, give them shade and shelter, Rock Spirits, do not obstruct their path, Little (golden) chains made of love, bind them, All you Spirits and Cousins too, guide and bless them when they set forth on their course with faith and love. May it be so, verily, may it be so forever.

PORXENZ UV THA MAIRIJ SAIRAMOONEE (PAHRT 1) [Now tha preest wil giv a goolden caan that hee haz just blesed, tuu wun uv tha kandadaats, and tha kandadaat wil plaas it on tha nek uv tha uther kandadaat, and risiit after tha preest: Ii [naam] biind miiself tuu yuu [naam] frum this daa forwerd, wether in tiimz uv hapeenis or sadnis, wether in daaz (fuhl) uv sun or raan, in guhd helfh or bad, welfh or povertee, and wee wil set forfh on tha kors uv ahr nuu liif, awlwaaz bownd and yuuniitid in sool and bodee. Thus Ii plej tuu yuu mii luv and oner ferever. [And tha uther kandadaat wil duu and risiit tha saam] (PAHRT 2) [Now tha preest wil saa:] Let us praa tuu kawl apon tha Spirits [And evreewun in atendens wil saa or siq:] Fahther Sun, xiin apon thair liif, Skii, bee awlwaaz kleer, Urfh and Raan, help them tuu groo, Sister Vuruna iluuminaat thair niits, Bruther Lalap let yor bihaavyer tord them bee guhd, Muther See, bee kahm wen thaa saal on yor surfes, Wind, inflaat thair saal(z) and kuul thair faasiz, Forest, giv them xaad and xelter, Rok Spirits, duu not obstrukt thair pafh, Litul (goolden) caanz maad uv luv, biind them, Awl yuu Spirits and Kuzinz tuu, giid and bles them wen thaa set forfh on thair kors with faafh and luv. Maa it bee soo, vairalee, maa it bee soo ferever.

The song of the starlings speaks of heroic deeds In the morning rain the heron does its laundry In the night the lark worships the stars Who sees the true nature of birds?

Tha soq uv tha stahrliqz speeks uv heerooik deedz In tha morniq raan tha heeron duz its lawndree In tha niit tha lahrk wurxips tha stahrz Huu seez tha truu naacer uv burdz?

Concerning the Stars. There are four types of stars. The name of the first is walking stars, because they wander the night sky. The name of the second is stationary stars. They are distant suns. The name of the third is dying, or falling, stars. They are rocks that fall from the night sky. The name of the fourth is foreign stars. They are the stars that appear for a short time in the night sky. They are suns of worlds whom Goddess destroyed in her wrath.

Kunsurniq tha Stahrz. Thair ahr for tiips uv stahrz. Tha naam uv tha furst iz wawkiq stahrz, bikawz thaa wahnder tha niit skii. Tha naam uv tha sekend iz staaxenairee stahrz. Thaa ahr distent sunz. Tha naam uv tha fhurd iz diiiq, or fawliq, stahrz. Thaa ahr roks that fawl frum tha niit skii. Tha naam uv tha forfh iz foren stahrz. Thaa ahr tha stahrz that apeer for a xort tiim in tha niit skii. Thaa ahr sunz uv wurldz huum Godes distroyd in her rafh.

A wicked man lived near a monastery. He believed [unfoundedly] that the monks had great treasure, and covetted it. The wicked man became a policeman. One day, he accosted a monk who was returning to the monastery. "Give me your key," he said. "I want to search the monastery for any criminals who may be hiding there." The monk said, "I have no key." The wicked policeman flew into a rage [lit. hurled himself into a rage], but the monk went into the monastery through the open door.

A wikid man livd neer a monestairee. Hee bileevd [unfowdedlee] that tha muqks had graat trezjer, and kuvitid it. Tha wikid man bikaam a paleesmen. Wun daa, hee akostid a muqk huu wuz riturniq tuu tha monestairee. "Giv mee yor kee," hee sed. "Ii wont tuu surc tha monestairee for enee kriminulz huu maa bee hiidiq thair." Tha muqk sed, "Ii hav noo kee." Tha wikid paleesmen fluu intuu a raaj [lit. hurld himself intuu a raaj], but tha muqk went intuu tha monestairee fhruu tha oopen dor.

"The Talking Rock" Yesterday I was walking along the beach when I tripped over a rock that could talk. I picked up the talking rock and said, "Hey! Are you a talking rock?" The talking rock said, "Yes, I am a talking rock." I asked the talking rock, "Why didn't you tell me to avoid you?" The talking rock replied, "Because I'm a mean talking rock." The talking rock's words made me angry, so I threw it into the ocean. I never saw the talking rock again.

"Tha Tawkiq Rok" Yesterdaa Ii wuz wawkiq alawq tha beec wen Ii tripd oover a rok that kuhd tawk. Ii pikt up tha tawkiq rok and sed, "Haa! Ahr yuu a tawkiq rok?" Tha tawkiq rok sed, "Yes, Ii am a tawkiq rok." Ii askt tha tawkiq rok, "Wii didn't yuu tel mee tuu avoyd yuu?" Tha tawkiq rok ripliid, "Bikawz Ii'm a meen tawkiq rok." Tha tawkiq rok's wurdz maad mee aqgree, soo Ii fhruu it intuu tha ooxen. Ii never saw tha tawkiq rok agen.

The boys whom I saw yesterday were Karl and Jake

Tha boyz huum Ii saw yesterdaa wer Karl and Jake

Merry Christmas!

Mairee Krismes!